Yeah, best not to refer to Robbie’s recent re-surfacing as a ‘comeback’; might make it sound like he’s got something new and exciting to offer. Never been a fan of his; there’s something about a prancing tit with mediocre vocals and average songs being pawed over by thick chav girls that just doesn’t quite do it for me, you know? The fact that Take That swooped back into chart success so easily, and with a few decent tunes, is testament to the fact that they have both talent and popularity. Robbie, on the other hand, has always seemed to thrive on the ‘popularity’ element, rather than being a consistently good artist.
In fact, he’s not an artist; he’s an ‘entertainer’. What does that mean exactly? Butlins Red Coats are entertainers, but I wouldn’t put them on a sold-out stadium tour. You can electrocute a small cat and it’ll bounce around in an entertaining way, but that doesn’t mean it should be encouraged. It seems the mantle of ‘entertainer’ has been applied by those who realise that he’s not that good vocally and his songs aren’t great, but he’s cocky and fun and oooh tickle his tummy he likes that! Who’s a good recovering depressed drug abuser? Who’s a good little pop star? You are! Yeeeees, you are!
His life / lifestyle will be commented on far more than his music, which might be sensible considering his music sucks the sweat off a dead gazelle’s bum. He’ll be photographed constantly and appear in Heat almost as often as Jordan or Cheryl Cole until he stops being weird or ‘on the edge’ and then they’ll dump him like a baby in a skip. The same tasteless, tacky chav girls will fawn over him they way they do over Peter Andre and he’ll have some success on the back of those fans who really think ‘Angels’ is a great and beautiful song. But within a few months, unless he gets a talent transplant ASAP, he’ll be back in the bargain bin of a late night garage before you can say ‘Rude Box’.
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